Sunday, 12 October 2014

The 25 Awkward Stages Of Having A Workplace Crush

1.) When you spy them from across the office for the very first time

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2.) You attempt, subtly, to find out their name and what they actually do there

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3.) You start making an obscene amount of effort with your appearance every morning, even though you already have to get up at 6am to get to work on time

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4.) You try (and fail) to catch their attention from across the room

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5.) But confronted with the possibility of having to actually interact with them, you panic

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6.) So you resort to Googling them instead

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7.) And arrange a conference with your friends to discuss everything you've discovered

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8.) Then one day you bump into them in the corridor and they smile...

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9.) You find their contributions to team meetings endlessly fascinating

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10.) When they're out of the office, work becomes infinitely less interesting

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11.) Then when they're back you have to try to conceal how pleased you are to see them

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12.) You prepare for their potential appearance at a work night out like this

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13.) And decide to finally make your move...

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14.) But success! They begin to acknowledge you in the office!

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15.) When they reveal details about their life, you have to pretend that you haven't already read it on their Facebook page

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16.) You may start to read too much into their actions

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17.) When you see a member of the opposite (or same, according to preference) sex talking to them in the staff kitchen

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18.) This person now becomes your sworn rival, whom you will never include in the tea round again

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19.) You begin to worry you might not be as subtle in your attentions as you'd hoped

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20.) Then one day they casually mention that they're seeing someone

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21.) And you have to hide your disappointment

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22.) Now seeing them in the office makes you feel like this

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23.) You get irrationally angry at the unfairness of it all

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24.) And decide to give up on love forever

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25.) But wait! Who's that new guy/girl...?

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